This book is dedicated to my friend Pascal Ladwein and his wonderful family. If it weren't for you, I'd still be in India!
Thank you for your friendship
Chapter I The House Call
Chapter II Another House Call
Chapter III The Birth of a Past Life
Chapter IV An Untroubled Childhood
Chapter V School Report
Chapter VI Training to be a Typist
Chapter VII A Job in Rüsselsheim
Chapter VIII An Encounter with Love
Chapter IX Wedding Bells
Chapter X A Theory in the Form of a Cake
Chapter XI A House in Kloppenheim Woods
Chapter XII Enough is Enough
Chapter XIII He Has to Die!
Chapter XIV My First Research on Site
Chapter XV The Time After
Chapter XVI A Reich, a Führer and Katharina
Chapter XVII Bombs Fall on the City
Chapter XVIII Full Circle
Chapter XIX Veritas
The House Call
It was 8:30 am, a cool morning in November of 2012. The temperature was dropping, and frost covered my windscreen. Winter was coming. Even as I was scraping off the ice, I was still thinking about what Ms B had said during our telephone conversation. Since early childhood, she had been suffering from mild to medium severity panic attacks whenever it was dark and she was all alone. It was an intermittent problem, which meant it didn't happen every time, but the symptoms had been getting worse her whole life. Her heart raced, she experienced nervous sweating and the feeling of being almost in a daze. Ms B already had several years of psychotherapy behind her, but without any improvement. She also told of a subliminal fear she felt whenever she saw green eyes. This had improved somewhat over the decades but she would still be overcome by a feeling of unease, even if the person was very nice and friendly. Still lost in thought, I started the engine and arrived at Ms B's door about 45 minutes later. She is a tall woman with friendly blue eyes and dark hair, and was about 48 years old at the time. She welcomed me with a smile and softly asked me to come in. There was a smell of freshly ground coffee, and I could hardly resist when Ms B offered me a cup. Her home was quite functional and completely lacking in luxuries. Somehow I got the feeling that Ms B had been through quite a lot in her life, even if she didn't show any sign of it on the outside. It would turn out that I guessed right. After thorough exploration (investigation) of the symptoms, I told Ms B. about how hypnotherapy worked and what to expect. I couldn't help noticing that there was fear in her eyes. All she knew or had heard about hypnotism was the typical stage shows featuring “mindless people” who would do anything the hypnotist asked them to do. I couldn't help but smile; I can't remember how often I have heard this during my time as a therapist. I told her that there was no reason to be frightened, and that clinical hypnosis had nothing to do with the stage shows. Hypnosis, strictly speaking, is the oldest and most effective form of therapy. It is where conventional therapy fails that hypnosis can, with minimal intervention and in the hands of a skilled practitioner, have the best results. Irrespective of age or religious belief, it gives access to a person's full potential. I will spare you a complete retelling of the history and applications of hypnosis, it would be enough for an entire extra book. Ms B now made herself comfortable and a few seconds later her anxiety and doubts had disappeared. She was in a deep relaxed trance which she acknowledged with a calm smile. As I took her deeper I soon saw that she had swiftly reached a somnambulant state. The term “somnambulism” comes from Latin and refers to walking while sleeping. In hypnotism it refers to a deep trance state where a subject becomes very suggestible. She was now deeply under, relaxed and motionless, and I began the therapy. Usually, I can quite quickly provide relief for anxiety such as described by Ms B. I also use the more familiar of the two possible forms of address in German, the “Du” form, because I had found that this leads more quickly to a deeper rapport (the relationship between the therapist and the patient). Some prefer the more formal “Sie” form, and I'm always happy to use it so that the patient's wishes are always respected. I carefully followed my routine and led her to one of the moments where she experienced anxiety and a panic attack. The therapeutic term for this is an “age regression” and means to start by looking for causes of the distress within childhood experiences. This is very easy, especially with somnambulist patients, and good work can be done. For other patients there are various other effective techniques. She was now at the age of 18, alone in her bed and she talked about what she was experiencing, although this did not help me reach a conclusion about the causes of her disorder. Further regression to the age of 16 didn't reveal anything concrete either and so I made further use of the somnambulist area of her mind. I simply instructed the unconscious part of her mind (more on this later) to go to the point that her problems stemmed from. Some time passed and Ms B's eyes started to move around, the movements plain to see below the eyelids. This reaction showed that she was already experiencing something. I carefully asked her where she was and the answer wasn't long in coming. She said, her voice a little different, frightened, “I'm in my bedroom,… in the grove!”
Q: so, you are now in the bedroom in the grove!?
A: yes…it´s dark…candle burns..
Q: what else is there? What is happening?
A: ..man.....man comes..
Q: who comes?
A: a man!
Q: what about this man? Who is this?
A: (breathing began to rise slightly, the fear in her was palpable)..... comes into room...
Q: do you know this man?
A: ...it´s a...it´s a friend of my husband..
Q: what does he do, what about him?
A: (she is breathing rapidly, acts always loaded).....they played cards...they played cards...Bernd lost..... (breathing increases more and more)....
Q: and then?
A: ......(very stressed and anxious)....he...undresses me.....
Her breathing was very heavy and she seemed to be experiencing everything all over again. She started making clear defensive movements under the thin blanket that was on top of her. It was clear that what was happening was the start of a rape. The whole situation had developed a horrible atmosphere, prompting me to intervene and tell her that what was about to happen was not happening to her physically and that she could watch it all as if through the eyes of an onlooker.
A: ....yes... (tearfully)...he says I´d be the first prize......profit (breathing is still very excited)
Q: what does he do?
A: ...I hold the blanket.....he pulls the blanket away....... I have a white nightgown...he laughs....he stinks!....pulls the nightdress up.....(breathing fast)
Q: and Bernd?
A: I do not know..
Q: is Bernd in the next room?
A: .....(rapid breathing)....he is downstairs...
Q: and the man? Does he rape you?
A: ......yes (scared)
Q: what do you say?
A: I scream!
Q: You shout?
Q: and then?
A: .....become silent (breathing fast)
Q: how old are you at this time, do you know that?
Q: are you married to Bernd?
A: yes (sounds pejorative)
Q: do you have children?
Q: how many?
Q: where are the children?
A: .. they are downstairs...they are in the room....
A: next to the kitchen..
Q: do the children sleep?
A: yes ...they sleep in their room..
Q: how old are your children?
Q: has this man raped you now?
Q: and what is Bernd doing?
A: ....he´s downstairs
Q: and he knows it!?
Q: what happens after he raped you?
A: he goes downstairs………..he got his prize..
Q: so, Bernd has gambled you away?!
A: yes! (sad)
Q: what do you say afterwards?
A: I cry!
Q: what is going round in your head? What do you think?
A: ....I hate my husband!
Q: has he done this often?
Q: how many times?
A: ....(slight cry)...several times..
At this point, everything was progressing in the usual way and I carried on with my investigation. This was doubly important because this was a rape and it was my duty to act in the interests of my patient. I was a little surprised but not put off by her statement that she was married, I initially decided to put that to one side for a moment and carried on.
Q: go for the first time, where was that?
Q: and who was it?
A: ..I do not know him..
Q: is he a friend of Bernd?
Q: was it also in your bedroom?
Q: do you have children at that time?
Q: how many?
Q: how old are they?
Q: and Bernd? Does he say anything to you?
A: is also at the door..
Q: what does he say?
A: ..he takes the cradle out..
A: (whispers)…from the bedroom..
A: he says...he has lost the game...I should be nice (emotional)
Q: what´s happening now?
A: ..he goes downstairs...with the cradle......I´ll...(unintelligible)...
A: ....the man rapes me
Q: and what happens after he did it?
A: gets dressed and goes..
Q: what is Bernd doing?
A: ...he is downstairs....he sits downstairs..
Q: he talks to you?
A: ........he came up later....he´s drunk!
Q: what does he say?
A: (breathes heavily)....asks whether I liked it..
Q: what are you saying?
A: I give him no answer...(breathes)...he is a bastard!!.........I hate him!!!
Q: and the name of the person?
A: I do not know (tearful)
Further explanation by Ms B revealed that she had been raped three times, always in the same way, by an acquaintance of her husband. It also emerged that her husband was a police officer, which I must say made me a little suspicious. Something was giving me an uncomfortable feeling, a feeling I'd never had during a therapy session before. The experience seemed real there was no doubt in my mind of that, but the circumstances...a drunken policeman, a card game with a woman as the prize, that didn't seem believable. My practical approach, my goal is always to help patients with their distress, spurred me to continue, with the intention of effecting a cure there and then. And additionally, I couldn't help but be a little curious, needing to hear a few more details...
Q: but is your husband still a policeman?!
Q: he says nothing? Is this normal for him?
A: when he drank, he does not know what he is doing..
Q: what are you saying?
A: ..he should leave me alone
Q: describe the bedroom where you lie?
A: double bed...opposite the bed is a window...small window...left...nightstand...there is the door…on the right is the vanity unit and on the left is a door...
Q: what is behind that door?
A: ....it is...like….a door where steps...as with a ladder down..
Q: is it in the ground?
Q: so a bottom flap?
She told me more about her surroundings, which were nothing at all like the living room of her current home. At that point, I didn't think that the situation had happened here. All I wanted, in asking about the room and the surroundings, was to be able to investigate things later. I asked her if she hadn't wanted to clean herself in the bathroom afterwards. That's when she said...
A: there´s no bathroom
Q: where do you wash yourself, then?
Q: in which room?
A: ...kitchen....with the basin...
Q: and with the basin you wash your entire body?!
It was now clear to me that this wasn't a memory from the present, because even people of limited means have at least a washbasin. But I continued...
Q: what do you use to wash your body? Do you put something in the water?
Q: which soap is that?
A: „Kernseife“! (curd soap)
Q: Does it smell?
A: yes! I can smell it......very slight.....does not smell of flowers...
Q: and how does it smell?
A: smell of „Kernseife“!
Q: not good?
Q: do you also have perfume?
A: .......fragrant rose petals!
Q: from whom is it?
A: ........from my mother!
Q: yes, but who produces the perfume?
A: ..Frankfurt....a shop in Frankfurt..
Q: what is with the vial?
A: ...it´s a small vial...with a silver closure...
Q: is there a name on it?
A: there is a rose on it......I see only one rose..
Q: and the packaging?
A: ......a wooden box
Q: is there a name on it?
Q: again please?! Matusell??!!
Q: anything else?
Q: so, Mademoiselle Rose!
A: yes...on the wood is....like a rose burnt in..
Q: is there a name of the manufacturer?
A: I do not know that..
Q: do you wear that often?
Q: when do you use it?
A: ..........if I....mix with people...
Q: and where are you going then?
A: to the church..
Q: where is it?
Q: do you go there often?
Q: and when do you go to church?
A: ......at Easter!
Now I'd heard enough and I began with a technique aimed at relieving her years of distress. Almost every therapist that employs hypnosis knows this phenomenon. Suddenly, you find yourself accompanying your patient into an “earlier life” that is somehow connected to the distress experienced in their current life. We don't talk about it, firstly because the things discussed might be things the person does not want shared and secondly because there aren't usually many verifiable details. My practical approach led me not to pay much attention to such things and concentrate only on the goal of helping the patient to the quickest possible improvement. I started to count, to bring Ms B out of her trance state. Her eyes slowly opened, travelled around the room, as if she needed to regain her bearings before she could consciously start to think about what had just happened. While she was in a trance, I had instructed her to remember every detail, although the rape was therapeutically screened so that there would be no enduring emotional repercussions. The first thing I heard from her was the astonished reaction, “That was me! Now I know why I'm frightened in the darkness!! I was raped, more than once!!” She was visibly relieved at the experience, but she was also upset by how real the situation had felt. Not to mention the rape and identifying Frankfurt and Kloppenheim. I have to admit, that I was interested. I'd heard people tell plenty of stories about villages in the forest. I'd even heard a story about a soldier in the Napoleonic Wars, who had been shot in a meadow. But something that had happened only 250km away from me? Never, I'd never heard of anything like that! Still lost in my thoughts, I subconsciously registered what Ms B was asking, “Mr. Würth, do you think all of that was real or did I imagine the whole thing!?” “To be honest with you, I don't know,” was the only answer I could give her. Unfortunately, there has been far too little investigation to be able to say with certainty what this phenomenon really is or how it operates. But at least I left with a smile on her face because now she was free of the fear and panic she had had since childhood. She immediately said, “Yes, because I know why! I've got a different feeling about it now.” I glanced at my watch and saw that it was definitely time to be going. We quickly arranged the next appointment and Ms B said goodbye with a thank you at the door. I sped away as the first snowflakes appeared on my car window, only to melt the next moment. My unconscious drove the car while my conscious mind was still with Ms B. Something about the session kept bothering me. What was it that wouldn't let me put it out of my mind? Was there an opportunity here? Hmm, I decided that as soon as I got home I should have a quick look to see where this place, Kloppenheim, was. That would tell me which of the numerous places in Germany that share the name of Frankfurt she had been talking about. But should I really waste my time on this!? I finally arrived at my house, these thoughts still going through my mind, and with a patient to see a few minutes later. A few hours later and what had been occupying my thoughts had completely slipped my mind. And time passed as usual until my next meeting with Ms B.
Another House Call
It was ten o'clock and I was back at Ms B's house. She told me she was doing very well. Three weeks had passed since our last meeting, and she hadn't experienced the symptoms again. She seemed a lot more relaxed, but also noticeably more curious, which I immediately noticed when she started to bombard me with questions. She still had a clear memory of being in the comfortable trance, and she wanted to know more about it. She told me that she didn't entirely know what to make of the experiences from our last meeting, as if they were a fantasy, and that the memories seemed more and more to be fading. While we were still sitting comfortably at the table with a cup of good coffee, she began to bare her soul. She told me about her childhood, which was like nothing I could ever have imagined. Her whole life seemed to have been lived under the Sword of Damocles. She was born into a poor family and they didn't support her development at all. She was just left alone, to grow up that way. She was constantly under pressure and living in fear of various kinds. She was under pressure because of her father, but also because of society's attitudes towards people from underprivileged backgrounds. She experienced this on the playground where she was beaten, which prevented her doing well at school and led to her being sent to a special school. I was touched. I hear worse things every day, worse things done by people to other people, but the way Ms B talked about her life left me speechless. I started to feel my lip trembling. What had just been a suspicion for me, was now being conformed. I struggled to understand how a person could deal with all this and live something like a happy life. She really had been through a lot! She had many more symptoms than most of my other patients. It seemed in her case as though the sorrows of the world had descended on just one person. Tears were starting to form in her eyes as she told me, forcing a wry smile, “As you can see, there's still a lot of work to do with me!” All I could do was nod, sympathetically. But that day I was there to ease her symptoms associated with “green eyes”. She again went and lay on the couch, and was soon in a deep comfortable trance. I followed the same procedure as before, first I concentrated on childhood, looking for something new. But, just as with the first time, I found the present symptoms in combination with various events, but the cause was hidden. I briefly hinted at this in the first chapter but it is now time to explain in more detail what I mean by “unconscious part of the mind”. The deep hypnosis gave me the opportunity to communicate with the so-called unconscious, while the conscious part of her mind had been, for the time being, moved in its entirety to a less active state. I gave instructions to the unconscious as soon as the hypnotic induction was complete, for example that the patient's right index finger was “yes”, the right middle finger stood for “no” and the thumb meant “maybe”, and that the unconscious could use this method to communicate at any time. This can be thought of as similar to the twitches we experience, now and again, just before falling asleep. These reactions are not conscious, they are controlled by the unconscious, a type of movement termed ideomotor phenomena. This technique, when used correctly, is a very useful tool and it can be incredibly helpful in ways we will see more fully later. I should note that I am not responsible for inventing these techniques, but that they were developed by Milton H. Erickson, Lesley LeCron and David Cheek. They are also used, with great success, by many other therapists. Now, let's return to where we left off. I took Ms B a little deeper within the trance and addressed the unconscious part of her mind, giving it the order to go to the point in time that was connected to the green eyes. It took quite a while, but then I saw the reflex controlled by the unconscious expressing itself through the brief movement of her thumb. Clearly this meant, “maybe!” For some reason, it didn't want to go the precise point in time. I knew there were a lot of reasons for this. It reminded me of the first session with Ms B, whose experiences had nothing in common with her present world. So I thought to myself that I should ask the unconscious if the connection to the green eyes lay in this life or in a previous one. If it was a previous life, I asked it to raise the “yes” finger. I had hardly finished my question when the finger I had said twitched. It was the first time I had used the words “previous life” and the answer had been immediate. It seemed the unconscious was clearly divided between the current life and the one that had been lived before. Perhaps a so-called reincarnation therapist would know more about this, but I had never purposely asked such a question. Although I had encountered similar situations now and again, as I mentioned earlier. There lay Ms B before me, in a deep trance, and perhaps an answer to the question that almost everyone must have asked at one time or another, “What comes after death?” lay there with her. My curiosity now rose to a level it had never reached before. I asked the unconscious part if there was the slightest chance of telling me about the situation. Again came an involuntary twitch, signalling yes. It might sound a little like hocus pocus, and it seemed like that to me too, but the unconscious had done exactly as I had asked, and we found ourselves again with her husband, the man we met in the first chapter. I moved to a less stressful subject by asking where she had met her husband. Then things carried on from there...
A: on the road in Rüsselsheim..
Q: what was the name of the street?
Q: how did you get to know him? What happened?
A: I was in a hurry.....he wore a uniform and I bumped into him…I was searching for something in my pocket and was in a hurry…he turned around and looked around...I had knocked him…had stumbled on him and had apologized….he had beautiful eyes…..he laughed and said that I would have to make amends….and we met again in the park..
Q: in which park?
A: in Rüsselsheim….there´s a park, where you can go for a walk and…there I met him…..we talked and I….told him about my work….he just begun to work for the police…and had not been there long!..
Q: how old is he now?
A: I do not know...twenty..
Q: and you?
Q: what did you tell about your work?
A: that I write…reports at the company Woll…..he was excited!
Q: does he live in Rüsselsheim?
Q: where does he live?
A: in a small apartment..
Q: where exactly?
A: I do not know, he just said that he lives in a small apartment..
Q: how is Bernd´s appearance?
A: he is tall…slim...sharp thin face….beautiful smile…happy, he….. smiles and laughs a lot..
Q: how long have you been in the park with Bernd?
A: one hour..
Q: did you arrange a new meeting?
Q: why not?
A: I did not dare, and he has not asked!
Q: and what happened next?
A: I met him later on the road….he was back on the road..
Q: have you told him that you live there?
A: yes...I told him that I was in a hurry to get to work…..he memorized it…he knows the road..
Q: and when you meet him again?
A: ah...I like him..
Q: did you fall in love with him?
Q: and what about him?
A: I think he likes me..
Q: do you meet each other again?
A: we want to meet again in a cafe „The lantern“...cafe...dance cafe
Q: you know the cafe?
A: yes...have been there once!
I'd like to briefly pause here, to note that this day awoke my interest and led to numerous sessions over a period of two years. Almost every statement she made is recorded as digital audio, with so many details that it is almost impossible to keep a clear oversight of it all. Over time, an entire life was revealed that spanned the years from 1877 to 1959! And it was a little reminiscent of a romance novel, although one that later ended in terrible tragedy for one of the characters. I have tried, to the best of my abilities, not to make any mistakes in order to do justice to the task. Everyone will have to decide for themselves how much to believe the whole story. The question of course arises of how I and Ms B came to the arrangement that made the sessions possible at all. It was, in the truest sense of the word, an understanding that developed almost into a kind of symbiosis. Ms B needed quite a lot of time spent on therapeutic interventions, but wasn't in a financial situation that would allow her to afford them, and I needed to satisfy the interest she had awoken in me, to hear everything there was to hear. It could be said – because of this understanding – that I had created the temptation for Ms B to spin stories for me in order to pay her bills, but I can assure you that this influence was so little that it was hardly worth mentioning. I have also worked with hypnotherapy for years and I would have immediately realised if she had consciously been acting. I would also like to say that Ms B is one of the most honest people I have ever met. It should be no surprise to learn that over the years a very respectful friendship has developed, which still exists between us now. During the writing of this book I have been able to tease details of even more of Ms B's previous lives. Almost every century had a previous life, from many different countries. There were just as many details as with Katharina, or more! I think one of the greatest strokes of luck is that Ms B began to draw the lives she had lived, giving us a visual insight into the characters involved. Let us now immerse ourselves in a past life that was lived long before we were born …
The Birth of a Past Life
A monotone repetitive noise woke me from a deep sleep. I had set my alarm early because today I had another meeting with Ms B. Although I had allowed ninety minutes for our session that day, it still seemed to me to be too little for what I now had planned. I wanted to know a little more about everything and I wanted to reduce every detail to its constituents. I was looking for answers to a lot of questions, a seemingly endless number of questions. How could the unconscious so clearly tell the difference between two lives!? Ms B was a devout Catholic and was more a believer in the Garden of Eden than the concept of reincarnation. Considering that religion often comes from strong conditioning in early childhood, and our unconscious works best through conditioning (such as driving a car, in fact almost all our practised actions work unconsciously), it could never have created the existence of another previous life, because from a religious Catholic point of view, there can only be paradise (the Garden of Eden). If we assume that Ms B had consciously invented the situation, the question then arises of why she would do that, there was no reason. And she would never be able to consciously mimic an ideomotor twitch, because I would have immediately recognised it. This twitch of the finger, when it is unconscious, is very characteristic and easily distinguished from conscious action. A good hour later I was back at the side of Ms B and she was already in a deep trance. I had agreed the finger signals and I asked the unconscious part if it was possible to go to a time “just before the birth into the previous life.” I wanted to know if the unconscious could help me to jump to any point I wanted within the previous life – should anything of the sort exist. As usual, I didn't have to wait long before the answer came! The “yes finger” twitched and my tension increased. Ms B didn't say anything, so I asked...
Q: how do you feel? How is that?
A: ....it´s tight....I´m afraid..
Q: describe the entire birth process!
A: it pushes around me...it pushes me...it is dark...it pushes me more and more...more and more forward....it is bright!! It is...it is right!!..It spins… everything (takes a deep breath)……I take air! I breath!..Is cold ...is a woman......she turns me....she turns me on my belly.....she turns me around again.......holding up my arms.....she wraps me...firmly!! My arms are pressed against my body!!.....I...can...not move my arms..
Q: is it pleasant for you?
Q: what else? Continue!
A: ..I see my mother...
Q: what is she doing?
A: ....she holds me..
Q: is it good?
A: yes!...She gives me the breast........hmmaah..
A: .... the first moment of ingestion..
Q: the first swallow? How is that? The milk?
Q: how was that for you?
A: .....that was so warm.....running so warm in the body...in the belly..
Q: it is comfortable?
A: yes...it feels good!
Q: does she say something to you?
A: ....she sss.......she hums..
Q: she hums?
Q: what does she hum?
A: ....she…...weighs me in her arm…and she’s humming while I get the breast..
Q: does she also say your name?
A: ....my Katharina..
Q: do you feel good now?
A: yes……I´m tired..
Q: who else is there?
A: ... (inaudible)
Q: who´s there?
A: ...the woman......who held me..
Q: have you heard her name?
A: ......Hannelore...............and my grandma..
Q: does she say anything?
A: you´re the grandma...my mother says...you´re the grandma ...you´re the grandma Waltraud..
A: now you are......grandma Waltraud!..
It was incredible and fantastic at the same time. Was I really going to be a witness to the beginning of a previous life? The atmosphere of what I had just experienced was still in the air. I watched Ms B's face, seeing the events she described reflected there. I hadn't prepared her, she hadn't known what questions I would ask her. She lay there, completely motionless, in a deep hypnotic state. Could it be that it was this state that had simply created these things? But then, who or what was responsible? Was it my questions provoking a chain of fantasies, just to provide me with the answers I wanted!? No!? That didn't fit with the emotions which so clearly mirrored what was being said. She found the tight swaddling uncomfortable on her body, and I asked about this when I saw her reaction. A lot of people still do this today, and it seems it might not be the best thing to do! The part where she describes the unusual process of drinking breast milk for the first time is worthy of close attention, how she describes it as flowing “warm” into her body. Also her first breath. Looked at in detail, these are all more or less experiences connected with fact. I don't think fantasies would necessarily go so deep and there didn't seem to be any embellishment. I went on, I wanted to hear of her “second year of life”, and I got my wish!
Q: what are you doing?
A: I’m walking..
A: ...in the room...on the wooden floor.....tap shoes...of little steps..
Q: you wear shoes!?
A: I have shoes..
Q: describe your shoes in detail!
A: they..are...so wool fabric...above is wool fabric...a small wooden.....so...hard soles and it is wool fabric and is tied to the foot.....it always knocks when you walk..
Q: what clothes do you wear?
A: ..dress......small dress….I have brown hair...curls...have...a ribbon in my hair.....have big eyes..
Q: which eye colour do you have?
Q: where are you going now?
A: ...I walk up to the table and under the table....I have...a rope...in my hand...there is a wooden wheel...I pull it behind me...a small round..
....like a wheel......I pull it behind me...because I always run around..
Q: can you already speak?
Q: what does your mother say to you?
A: ....that I should be quiet....I...that I..not to run so fast…….she converses with a man...I do not know him...he is wearing a black suit..
Q: do you hear what they say?
A: .......there is a kettle on the stove….they made a fire...the kettle boils... ...they sit there.....talking and drinking..
Q: is he a nice man?
A: .....I do not know..
My mobile phone vibrated, distracting me from my disbelief. An emergency meant that I had to end the session. This was because, as well as being a hypnotherapist, I am also a chiropractor, and it quite often happens that I am called by somebody suffering an attack of back pain (lumbago) or a misaligned vertebra. I brought Ms B back to consciousness and told her to remember what had happened, to making sure that she wasn't suffering from hypnotic amnesia. I decided to do this primarily because it meant that, after the session, we could talk about what had happened, which I had often done as part of my therapy, with great success. I later realised however that I had made a great mistake that would bring grave consequences. Not because of the information itself, but because, due to the almost unbelievable tragedy that would reveal itself over time, the unconscious had created a very powerful defence mechanism. As fantastic as it may sound, it was precisely for this reason that I was later able to develop a better understanding of the unconscious, which led to one of the keystones of the theory I was to develop later. Compared to what I know now, I actually understood very little. Neither how to do a regression, nor the best approach to take. Driven by my desire to know more, I was very much taking a leap into the dark, and this meant I was for the first time abandoning my therapeutic preconceptions. Though I'm now happy that I did, because it brought such rich rewards. Starting slowly, initially with superficial explanations, I will show you chapter after chapter of ever more intense and unbelievable information. The factual nature and level of detail will really draw you in, not to mention the subject's exceptional personality and fascinating life story. I would like to advise the reader that this book presents probably the most detailed account of death, intermediate states and birth ever written down at length in any form. I hope it will awake as much fascination and curiosity in you as I experience, still to the present day.
An Untroubled Childhood
The story of a young girl's fairly untroubled childhood emerged over a number of sessions and from a wealth of detailed material. She was an only child, quite sheltered, and she grew up within what seemed to be a financially well-off family. Her name was Katharina. She had grey eyes, long brown pigtails and the typical clothes of her time. We were now in her parent's house, with Ms B once again in a deep trance. Her breathing was relaxed and deep, her ribcage moving so little her breaths were almost imperceptible. There was always something ghostly about the feeling when a voice came in answer to my questions, a voice that didn't fit the woman in front of me at all. Sometimes, especially during deeply emotional descriptions and experiences, a woman with a very strong personality appeared, a personality quite unlike that of Ms B. It was almost like this other presence could be felt, a feeling very difficult to describe, much less write it down on paper. Now and again it reminded me a little of a séance where the medium suddenly starts to speak in a spooky voice. It wasn't quite like that in our sessions but her voice sounded as though it came from somebody with a very different character, especially when she became angry. But why don't we let Katharina speak for herself...
Q: how old are you?
Q: what are you doing?
A: ....I sit...I am sitting at the table..
Q: what are you wearing?
A: I´m wearing a skirt...have...socks...I have shoes....heavy shoes..
A: they are so hard on the feet!
Q: depict them?
A: ....they have...a heavy hard sole...brown...brown leather...they laced up...until the leg...are heavy!
Q: how is your hair?
A: ....long!...Braids...two braids...yes..
Q: describe the room where you are!
A: .....a clock...it is...it stands...round wooden...has a small swing....a bit longish......stands on the cupboard…..the cupboard…is dark.....there is a figure....a man and a woman….I´d like to have it(smiles)...they…they are holding each other..
Q: is it wood or metal?
A: ...it‘s not wood....this is...I do not know what this is called….it‘s beautifully painted..
Q: is it colour?
A: is colour...a little bit..
The description of a figure on the wardrobe sounds a lot like porcelain. Especially so because she had mentioned that it had been painted. Porcelain figures of the period were usually painted in a restrained style, in other words just a “little”.
Q: what are you looking at?
A: ....small cart....doll´s pram..
Q: is that yours?
Q: you have a doll? Describe it!
A: yes...it has beautiful eyes...blue eyes...big eyes and a nice red mouth...a dress on..
Q: and the face? Is that wood or metal?
A: ....this is....can break..
Q: is it like a cup?
Q: do you know how it‘s called?
Just like this session, where Katharina remarked that she didn't know this material, but thought the comparison with a cup was apt. She knew it was fragile. It was interesting to watch Katharina as she described the things she saw and the things she was in connection with at that moment. But the information, what it actually was, what it was called, seemed impossible for her to know, because of her age. From this we can assume that what she had in her memory was the only information available at that point in time. It is astonishing to think that the unconscious has available to it the entire content of a whole previous life, but it only allows, or can only allow, access to the information of a certain moment. If I could elicit the finger signal at any point of a previous life, it meant that the unconscious had the entire knowledge of every point in time, which would lead us to expect that the information about “porcelain” should also be present, even at Katharina's young age, if we are simply asking for this information. We may expect this to be the case, but it isn't so! She can only describe what she really has knowledge of at that point in time. It is precisely this phenomenon that I have spent a lot of time thinking about, and which I will later describe in more detail, as part of my theory.
Q: is the doll painted?
Q: does her face shine?
Q: does she have hair?
Q: what´s with the hair? Has it hair?
A: yes painted..
Q: and the arms of the doll?
A: .....they are also fragile...not the body!
Q: you must always be careful when you play with it?
A: yes...like...a little baby...must watch…it must not fall or even be left!
Q: how do you know that?
A: my mom told me so!
Q: and the feet of the doll?
A: ...are also....fragile...the feet are associated to the body and the body is soft..
Q: delineate the doll´s pram!
A: ........like a small basket....like a round basket....it looks...there are small metal wheels and...above the handle...is metal....on which is bound up the handle...where you can push it..
Q: is the pram bigger than you or smaller?
Q: where you are going with your doll carriage?
Q: what are you looking for?
A: ..there´s a meadow....there...(inaudible)....is a water pump..
Q: a water pump? Where is it?
A: in the garden...it‘s on the meadow...on...I do not know…however you call that..
Q: try to describe it!
A: ...it…has two wheels...there are....they can be harnessed to an animal...standing in the meadow...so wooden…there is iron...where you open the bottom....iron that...it hangs on a chain...is made of wood...this is done then to a cow or a horse...then pull the draws a furrow…in the ground...that one there...that…can make vegetables..
Q: is it a plow?
Let us examine the latest description in particular, assuming it to be a product of complete fantasy, surely such a fantasy doesn't require so many words to describe just one thing. Because a fantasy would produce something complete and fixed, and internalised. Here we see very clearly that the young Katharina was trying to describe something that she had obviously seen many times. It really was as though she was standing in front of this device, and also remembering how she had seen the plough put to use, how it worked and what it was used for. But what are we to make of all this!? Now it really starts to get complicated! It seems we will need to look at everything a little closer. So, for one, we have Ms B on the sofa in a deep trance. Her unconscious was kind enough to reveal something from a previous life, in this case the young Katharina standing in the front garden. This Katharina now reacts to my question about what she can see in the garden. She sees the device in front of her and starts to describe it. In her description, she is remembering what she had seen when the device was used before! This means she must also have access to an area of the unconscious, in order to retrieve these memories. It is only then that she can describe its use, “for example for vegetables.” This is only possible at all if she had at one point seen that vegetables eventually grew from the furrows. We can be sure of the following: Ms B has a subconscious that I use to gain access to a previous life, and this previous life, Katharina in this case, shows us with her statements that she remembers and therefore also has a subconscious. This, in turn, is very remarkable because this would make her practically an independent personality, except without its own body!? Or is the subconscious the same for both? It makes me smile when I think about how interesting the human mind is. I will go on to investigate precisely this point, which means you can be sure things will get interesting!
Q: and who is doing that?
A: .......I dont know..
Q: what is your father´s job?
A: ..........I do not know how it´s called...he writes for others..
I now took her to the age of 7, still at her home, standing at the front door, and asked her to describe the building.
A: .....has windows...has two windows below and above on the side is the entrance...
Q: can you also see a house number?
Q: and the street....what is the name of the street?
Q: so you live in Tannenweg 3?
Q: is there a graveyard?
I had asked about the cemetery because I thought, from the distance of the cemetery, it would be easier to make out the surroundings later. It was quite a surprise when it emerged that it wasn't as far away as I had thought. It was very useful in this instance that I had asked, because I could do further research when I visited the site, and find the place she had lived and the former location of her parent's house, which exactly matched young Katharina's description.
Q: where is it?
Q: where here!?
A: at Tannenweg....on the other side..
Q: does your father have a car?
Q: how does he come to work?
A: ......he goes...a bit of walk..
Q: what is his job?
A: he advises...advises for...people..
Q: what exactly?
A: I do not know...helping people...advises..
Q: describe your father, how does he look like?
A: .......he is tall…slim.....a pointed noise...has...brown hair...long black coat..
Q: what does he wear on his head?
Q: does he have something in his hands?
A: ....a folder...leather wallet..
Q: and the shoes...how do they look?
A: .....shine...are black..
Q: and his voice?
A: ....very soft! He is a very quiet...quiet person..
Q: has your father a private room in the house?
Q: depict it!
A: ...there is a cabinet...glass door...a cabinet with doors and small windows..
Q: does he also have books?
Q: do you know these books?
A: .....no...for work..
Q: what else is in the room?
A: ...a feather...a container with ink...to write...paper rolls..
Q: and what are they for?
A: ....I dont know...there are paper rolls...for writing...a painted picture..
Q: what else?
A: ...a broom...it is round...a stalk…a wooden handle...with raffia...attached.......wooden floor..
Q: can you buy those brooms?
Q: where can you buy them?
A: there are...there is someone who produces them...makes the basket...from willow...he produces them…sometimes come such...people..who want to sell...and who pull a cart…and then drive across the road and shout..
Q: what do they shout?
A: .."the weave Hennes (Hans) is on the road again"!....And he has baskets…baskets and brooms...and has them in his cart...and there are baskets...and brooms...on top..
Q: do you know what a broom costs?
In a few weeks later session I let her go into her 10th year, to her parents´home.
Q: how old are you?
Q: where are you exactly in the house now?
A: I am outside!
Q: what are you doing outside?
A: ....I‘m playing..
A: ..on the grass..
Q: what are you doing there?
A: I have a stick in my hand!
Q: what are you doing with it?
A: ....playing with a rabbit!
Q: he´s going around freely?
A: yes! I got him out of the stable..
Q: is that your rabbit?
Q: your rabbit?!
A: ...yes...it‘s us..
Q: who us?
A: ...daddy....he has....he has..us.....I beat the rabbit with my stick on his head..
Q: you hit him on the head!?
A: yes! (emotionless)
Q: why are you doing this?
A: ..do not know..
Q: do you enjoy this!?
A: yes...I...he has long ears......I raise his ears with the stick..
Q: is that fun?
A: ..yes...he is tall...and...makes...he eats the grass...eating in the meadow..
Q: shall you eat it?
Q: do you like to eat rabbit?
A: oh yes!!
Q: and you know that you are eating your rabbit sometimes!?
Q: and you don’t mind?
Q: why not?
A: they are meant to be eaten!!
This is a very interesting description when we remember that she was ten years old and playing with her rabbit, but she had no feelings for the rabbit. To her, it is not a cute little bunny, the kind any modern child might want to play with. Katharina had a very unsentimental relationship with the rabbit, based on the fact that later it would end up on her plate. She bashed it on the head with her stick and picked it up by the ears. She regarded it and interacted with it as what it was to her, something to eat. This is completely understandable when we remember the date; the period relating to these questions is 1887. You must now be wondering where this date came from. I have taken it from a little later in the story because she would later mention her date of birth quite often, for example when she was describing identity documents. It is also interesting to know that Ms B, after emerging from the trance, was very keen to tell me that she was actually an animal lover, despite what I might think after the events with the rabbit, and that she would never be capable of doing such a thing. She has got three cats and takes very good care of them. The very idea of doing anything like this was foreign to her.
Q: what are you wearing?
A: ....I wear a skirt.........shoes, I have to fasten one’s shoes.....I have braids......a grey blouse...with silver buttons...knee socks.....have long stockings…up to the knees.........there goes the meadow down.......bottom right is a brook...there´s a fence...there are trees...there is much meadow on the right..
Q: do you have any siblings?
In the next session she described a picnic from when she was twelve, which meant 1889 in Frankfurt. She always called the place she lived Frankfurt. Perhaps this was because Frankfurt was still a free city in her parents' time, right up until 1866, and she may have been influenced by the name they used when they talked about where they lived. Whatever the case, it made my initial research difficult because it was never really clear if she meant Frankfurt itself or one of its suburbs. In a later sitting it finally emerged that she had been talking about a place called Nieder-Eschbach. But let's go back now to the time of Katharina's childhood and see through her eyes how May Day looked to a child of that time. Again and again, especially in the following chapters, Katharina shows herself to be unusually gifted at describing things. She is quite unique. There is, of course, plenty of literature relating to reincarnation, but nothing quite like this in its detail, its credibility or its wealth of information! This also includes the parts relating to the process of birth and the investigation of what happens at the time of death. She has, to all practical purposes, opened a door onto the past for everyone, which will facilitate all kinds of historic and scholarly investigation. And this door is still open today! I would certainly be able to have her describe every second of this previous life, but the time I have available to investigate this phenomenon is limited. The little that I have collected here in this book is far more than I could have imagined possible. Now Katharina herself again...
Q: where are you?
A: on a meadow..
A: in Frankfurt..
Q: what are you doing?
Q: what?! Why are you smiling?
Q: what do you have with you?
A: basket...there are some people..
Q: who is with you?
A: .....I...I dont know..
Q: do you know the person?
A: there are several people who make a picnic on the lawn..
Q: ok, are your parents with you?
Q: so there are some people sitting on the lawn and having a picnic?!
A: yes!...There´s a bridge!
Q: is it large or small?
A: ......tall bridge...lampposts.....is May Day…..over river..
F: what is the name of the river?
Q: and today is the first of May, do you also know the year?
Q: look around, how many people are there? Are there many?
A: there are families!
Q: how did they come there?
A: ....with the ‚Fuhrwagen‘!
A: a ‚Fuhrwagen‘! This is such a cart drawn by horses...where you then...then...can sit on..
Q: did you also come with such a car?
A: ...no! With the coach!
Q: with your own coach?
Q: who’s the owner of the coach?
A: it is a...city coach!
Q: city coach!? Does it cost anything?
Q: how does it work? If you want to drive with it, how does the driver know when and where?
A: ..there´s a plan! It has...certain times...where it drives...it drives through the streets..
Q: oh so...there is a timetable and you can be guided by it?
A: yes...you can hear…when it comes!
Q: and when it comes you can easily enter?
Q: how does the coachman look like?
A: ....black suit...has a cylinder on the head....sometimes he blows a horn!..
Q: a horn!? Then you can already hear him from far away!
Q: what does such a trip cost?
A: ...........it is not expensive....it depends on the path..
Q: have you ever crossed this bridge?
Q: where to?
Q: well, we now go back to the meadow where you make your picnic. Can you tell me what’s included in your picnic?
A: .....yes...apples....canned cherries....bread....sausage..
Q: which sausage is it?
A: aspic...a piece...aspic!
Q: do you like it?
Q: what else?
A: .....a piece of cheese...and.....wine..
Q: wine?! Do you like wine?
Q: who drinks wine?
A: ..my father..
Q: which wine is that?
A: it is a brown bottle...but there is no...label on it...there is only a brown bottle and a cork...and it‘s wine in it..
Q: and you know that it’s wine?
A: yes! The wine was bottled!
A: ....there’s a place..
Q: do you know where?
A: .........the Spätling..
Q: do you know anything in Frankfurt? Have you visit some places with your 12 years?
Q: and what?
A: ..there is a small theater...a puppet theater..
Q: where is it?
A: ...on the market!
Q: and what can you see there?
A: puppets! With puppets....for children..
Q: do many little children go there and watch it?
Q: what does the entrance cost?
A: ....there is no fixed price...it‘s open...they have...because you can…throw money into it...where you can give...then the children sit there...on the market..
Q: on the market?
A: yes on the market it is!
Q: oh so...this is like a small stand!?
Q: is there anything on it?
A: ........Seppel and...Mina…..Mina..
Here again we see the incredible range of detail. There is an answer for every question. She describes what she sees and, somehow, her descriptions have a structure that is very believable. Often, especially at the beginning, I became aware of something within myself. It was the realisation of a new consciousness that was forming within me, something that was completely changing the way I saw everyday life. This book, and everything described within, has forced me to be open to a new way of seeing things and to be ready to carry on developing in this direction. My curiosity drove me on, like a ship towards its destination port, but on an endless ocean that only allowed a hint of what awaited it on its journey.
Q: what is your favourite game?
A: .....I like.........counting cobblestones..
Q: you count cobblestones!?
Q: and how do you do that?
A: but I only count to five!
A: then I´ll start from the beginning...I jump on the fifth stone that I chose...I jump with my foot on it...then I start from the beginning..
Q: anything else!
A: ....hm...spitting water..
Q: how does it works?
A: you take a handful of water into your mouth until it’s full...then you have to…spit out the water...as far as you can!!
Q: and you´re good?
Q: how far can you spit the water?
A: (whispers proud childlike) two metres!!
To here these wonderfully naive and childlike descriptions coming from the mouth of a grown woman was an unparalleled experience. The smallest reaction could be seen, the smile that spread across her face. Sometimes a friendly grin or the wrinkling of her brow caused by anger, fury or aggression.