To Hell with Bloodsuckers
a Willow the Vampire short story
For Alisa, a free spirit with a big heart.
BookRix GmbH & Co. KG
To Hell with Bloodsuckers
This short story is entirely a work of fiction. The names, characters and incidents portrayed in it are the work of the author’s imagination. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or (un)dead, events or localities is entirely coincidental.
Conditions of Sale: This book is sold subject to the condition that it shall not, by way of trade or otherwise, be lent, re-sold, hired out or otherwise circulated without the publisher’s prior written consent in any form of binding or cover or electronically other than that in which is it published and without a similar condition including this condition being imposed on the subsequent purchaser.The author and illustrator asserts the moral right to be identified as the author and illustrator of this work.
“He’s locked himself into the back room and refuses to come out.” Ebenezer Hardcastle banged his fists against the front door of the rundown manor house.
“Leave it! We’ll get him another way. Look, what I’ve just found!” George Greedy held up an orange and white striped cat and grinned from ear to ear.
Both representatives of Avarice Slimeball, a local branch of a Stinkforthshire-based private bank, tiptoed around the house until they reached the rear garden and spotted the homeowner peering out of a window. Mr Greedy jumped right in front of the window and lifted up the loudly protesting cat by its neck.
“Open up at once or I’ll wring the moggie’s neck, do you hear, Bakewell? You haven’t paid your mortgage for months now – get your sorry backside out of this house at once! Our business terms and conditions state clearly when to pay your instalments and what happens, when you default on payments.” Greedy shook the cat violently and raised the protesting animal high above his head, where the hapless creature dangled from his arm in dangerous proximity to his trilby hat. The cat mewed and stretched out her paws into the cold winter air as if to ask for clemency and the return to her patch by the fire.
Through the window pane appeared the pale faces of a man and a small boy. When Greedy took another step towards the house, both inmates were so horrified they jumped back several paces. Shortly afterwards the creak of the front door announced the house was now open for an assault. Greedy and Hardcastle ran around the house once more and came breathlessly to a halt in front of Mr Bakewell.
Former headmaster Bakewell stood with his chin up and head held high in the door frame and reached for his pet. “Give me back my cat, you wretched blood sucker!”
Instead of following this polite invitation, Greedy turned to his colleague Hardcastle and handed him the cat. Hardcastle took the cat and stuffed it under his coat to prevent it from scratching him as an act of vengeance. Delighted about the outcome, George Greedy bobbed up and down on the tip of his toes, swaying back and forth, until he nearly collided with Mr Bakewell’s nose.
“Bakewell, we’ll give you five minutes to get your measly belongings together. This is no longer your house, do you understand? You’ve lost your job at the school and you owe us a lot of money. The estate belongs to us now…erm…I mean it belongs to the Bank. Tomorrow morning the bulldozers will arrive and tear this ruin down, do you hear? Right, get on with it. My time costs money…money you haven’t got, Bakewell!”
Bakewell made a fist and prepared to hit Greedy, but seven-year-old Kevin forced his way past his father and ran out of the house. Kevin pushed the astonished Greedy out of this path and jumped Hardcastle, who at that very moment was trying to control the furious cat under his coat. Kevin raised his foot, aimed and kicked Ebenezer Hardcastle’s shin so hard the shock caused the ...