When I began to love myself unconditional, I had a need to love others the same. My relationship with myself helped me to stop judging or criticizing myself harshly, therefore I stopped doing it to others. This is how my relationships improved with others, even if someone disliked me.
So who Am I? This is the real question.
I realized that my personal relationship with myself affected others. Am I gentle or merciful towards myself, am I overly critical of myself, or do I hide my true feelings from myself? I was unconscious of how I really felt about me.
My flaws, my weaknesses and how I truly felt about me was affecting others, even how others treated me. The things I did not like about me had me get into conflict with others. Cultivating an unconditional love for myself was my cure. I had to accept everything about me positive and negative, even my past mistakes. love all of me even when I was broke.
I believe a personal relationship with God, Higher self, can only be possible through self-reflection, looking inwards into our darkness. Love changed my perception of the world, that everyone matters regardless of my personal feelings. We are who we are.
This way we can love others as they are, it is not my fault why a person is a way that they are. I do not know what they have been through. So I began to love others unconditionally, even those who I personally do not like. We don't have to like everybody, but we can treat everyone with respect by letting them be.
But first, I had to treat myself this way to express it outwardly to others.
My relationship with my wife is still not perfect, I don't believe that there is such a situation. I am still learning and growing. I believe that external relationships are a direct reflection of who we are internal. Intimacy which is (into me I seek). God within will guide us through our intuition.
Breakups can be one of the toughest things to overcome when we do not learn why it had to end.
The stability of a relationship begins in infancy, psychological anguish is the reason why most of my relationships failed. I used chakra work to help me heal from my traumatic experiences. I am not saying this is the only way. As I became aware of Higher Self/Spirit within, I started to see my old perception of myself unfold in front of my eyes.
I then saw how my strengths and weaknesses due to insecurities affected my relationships with others. I noticed how my hidden pain and anger from my past experiences interfered with my relationship with myself.
I lost good and important people because I had issues that I refused to come face to face with because my pride was getting in the way.